Tuesday, October 01, 2013

Uniformity

In preface, please watch this little scene from Men In Black...

Then behold one of the semi-regular "outfits" I've been wearing recently.


That picture was off my phone from a month ago before I first outed myself as a "shirted leader" in Cub Scouts.  

The angle/pose is otherwise known as Trying to Show The Most of This Outfit in a Mirror Without Showing the Phone and it kind of works because it looks like I'm doing the Cub Scout Salute, which is one of the first things I'm supposed to teach all the little Tiger Cubs that I'm supposedly "leading" this year.  Yikes.   Just imagine 5 - 8, 6 year old boys, all in one small room.  During the infernal hours of after dinner and before bedtime.  And of course, my kid, is the worst of them all.  Then, since it is a Pack Meeting, add on top of that, a bunch of other boys, ages 6 - 12.  OMGBATSHITBANANAS*.  

Anyway.  Here's a more blatant Standing in Front of a Mirror Taking a Selfie With My Phone one from before last night's first Pack Meeting.  I've changed from sandals to Keds and have added a tote bag and shades.  


OK now really, am I not DEAD SEXY?  Ha ha just kidding.  For real though, like old Will up there, I do feel that I look OK / GoOOod.  Or at least that I'm trying to wear it as Me as possible.  The skirt is not a regulation skirt, it's one I've had since forever, from a Bass & Co. outlet.  But it is very similar to the official skirt.  Actually I don't even think there is a regulation green skirt.  But there is a more femme "blue & gold" outfit that I'm just not ready to rock right now, but you never know, maybe later.  If I find a vintage set or something.  I mean come on, culottes rock!  

Because really, right now, I'm still fairly uncomfortable wearing that shirt and pretty much strip if off as soon as I get home.  Probably I'll get more used to it as time wears on, but for now it is still A UNIFORM and the little rebellious persona inside me is just bucking against it as hard as it can.  

And it isn't anything against Cub Scouts, or my family's involvement, or anything... it is just me and my public persona?  My relationship with uniforms?  How I want to view myself?  Or how I want other people to view me?  I don't even know.  

But as I've come to realize, I've never liked wearing something that somebody else says I have to wear.  I have always been uncomfortable in regulated clothing.  Starting with softball uniforms, working up through Jazz Band and Marching Band and for a while even wearing a baseball cap and screenprinted t-shirt during a stint as a prep cook in college was super annoying.  I'd supply photographic evidence of those previous uniformed endeavors if I could, but that would mean saving as a draft and never getting back to it.  So if I find them I might add them later.  

Now that is not to say that I'm not comfortable wearing other rather uniform looks.  Like "slacker mom" or  "sweaty runner" or  "skanky pool/beach rat" or "vintage diva"  or what-have-you...  

Basically, I'm not trying to say I'm the most special unique snowflake out there.  

I'm just sayin'... uniforms have always been hard for me.  They always sit just a little too square or something?  Is it because I don't feel like I'm up to the challenge/respect/determination a uniform typically demands?  Possibly.  

But I'm trying.  Trying to wear it with flair, like my crazy Croc-a-fried husband wears his. 

Because I get it.  It's nice to be a part of something.  To identify.  Even if it's only on the outermost OMG-do-I-really-have-to-do-this? fringe, at first.  These last few meeting where I've "worn the shirt" I've interacted way more than I have in the past.  I've been part of something, as opposed to just standing on the sidelines, waiting to go home.  I mean, I'm still waiting to go home, but at least when I'm a "shirted leader" I'm expected to contribute a little bit more and I'm owning up to that.    To be there for the whole and not just my family.  

*Also note-  the boys sometimes buck against wearing their "Class As" too.  Because they ARE slightly more uncomfortable than the normal attire.  And when wearing them, it means something "more" is expected of you.  Which I guess is what it boils down to.  Even for me.  But then again, Milo earned his first belt loops & pins last night and he excitedly opened all his new "bling" after the meeting and wanted to put them on his belt and everything right away.  So there is definitely something about group recognition and earning achievements that we all thrive on, even early on.  

Anyone want to chime in on uniformity?  Either abstractly or specifically?  I think it relates even to the blogging world.  Especially in the "what I wore today" niche that I fell into several years ago...



2 comments:

  1. Actually, you look kinda like a superhero.

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    1. Ha! Thanks. I'll have to remember that as I'm internally freaking out at tonight's meeting, surrounded by eight 6 year olds and their doting parents...

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